because laughing maniacally feels best when done together

mr. elephant

mr. elephant

elephant-308776_960_720Submitted this for a freelance gig writing children’s books… no takers.  I still feel for you, mr. elephant.


For Miss Giraffe’s birthday

She sent invitations galore,

And though most furry friends would attend

One animal wasn’t so sure.

“I know I can’t have any cake,”

Mr. Elephant said,

“The calories go right to my hips,

Everyone knows I’m well-fed.”

“Please come!” Mr. Duck said back

And though he remained hesitant,

When they got there everyone was so glad

To see Mr. Elephant!

Mr. Duck told Miss Giraffe

Mr. Elephant’s no-cake news

She knew just what she’d say to take away

Mr. Elephant’s blues!

“Cake’s hard for me, too,” she said,

“And though I find it yummy,

It’ll be an hour ‘til

It’s actually in my tummy!”

“I didn’t think about your neck!”

Mr. Elephant said with a laugh,

“Well then, shall we have some cake?

And happy birthday, Miss Giraffe.”

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