90s guys are hot

Now that I’m 31, I’m re-watching random ass movies and shows from the 90s and finding so many dudes to be hot suddenly. We’re they always lookers or is it because I’m so old, married, and parenting?

Take Kurt Russell. He was just a dad-like figure when I was about ten watching Breakdown but now I sort of want a creepy Mac truck driver to scoop me up so Kurt will do anything to find me.

Bill Paxton. He may be one of my favs to impersonate and God rest his soul but 90s Bill Paxton could GET IT be it in the midst of the tornado itself or floating above the titanic, wherever he wants. Bill’s clearly a go-getter so come and get it.

Christian Slater. He was hot when I was 10 so no big surprise here. Same goes for Luke Perry.

Ross from Friends. Notice I didn’t say David schwimmer. Ross is funny, hot, successful and desperate for a flourishing romantic relationship. Ross can get it.

Jordan Knight from NKOTB. I always preferred bad-ass Donnie back when I was 5 (the female’s magnetic draw to the bad boy starts fairly young I suppose) but lead singer, 2017, 40-something-year-old Jordan with the nice shirts and the six pack can get it.

Tom Hanks. HOT.

Uncle Jesse. Always was hot but now 6765564 times hotter now that we relate on an adult-like level. In terms of comparability, we’re both musicians (excuse me but I did sing lead for that unfortunate cover band for six months), we both have incredible hair that no one is permitted to touch, and we’re both Elvis impersonators. What? No I’m not.

I’ll find more, watch.