because laughing maniacally feels best when done together

That Time I Got 86 Donuts at Dunkin

That Time I Got 86 Donuts at Dunkin

This just happened.

I just had a fabulous mom’s night out with the Lakewood Ranch Moms Group.

On the way home, I asked my husband– who took on the performance of putting Declan to sleep tonight– if he wanted me to pick him up anything.

“Chocolate donuts.”


“Dude, I’m not going IN anywhere. So what, you want Dunkin Donuts??” 

It was freakin 9:45 at night.

“Chocolate munchkins,” he clarified.

PS “HUN”, if you read this, I was just being NICE but thanks for actually making me stop somewhere…

I pulled into the DD drive thru and asked if it was even possible to get chocolate munchkins this late at night.

“Actually, we’re all out of chocolate munchkins, but we have all of the other flavors.”


I paused.

“Hmmm, well do you have the equivalent to chocolate munchkins in donut form?”


“Hmm ok…in your expertise, how many chocolate donuts equal a box of chocolate donut munchkins?”


I enjoyed her confidence, and here’s where things took a ridiculous turn.

“Okay, let me have six chocolate donuts then, please.”

“Okay, so you want 12?”

“12?!?! No, just six.”

“You just want six, but imma give you 12. Imma give you the hook-up.”

Is this what people who win the bonus round on WOF feel like? Is this what it’s like to get the $1.00 on the big wheel on Price Is Right? My excitement level legit went from “I don’t even WANT donuts” to “HOW MANY DONUTS CAN. I. GETTTT?!?!?”

She continued:

“In fact, imma only charge you for two munchkins, and imma give you the hook-up.”

Lord, I’m not sure what I did or what I must do, but let me know, because this entire situation was beyond me.

“You can pull up,” she instructed.

Flabbergasted and wide-eyed, I journeyed from the order mic to the pick-up window where I could no longer contain the hysterics.

Girlfriend was coming towards me with THREE DOZEN DONUTS and FIFTY munchkins.

Better yet:

“54 cents please.”  She cracked up.

“Okay, WHAT is wrong with these donuts?!” I demanded.

“Nothing!! We’re just so close to close, these are otherwise gonna be thrown away.” 

I had simply struck gold. This morning’s gold, but gold nonetheless.

I handed my card over and collected my receipt. 54 whole cents.

She insisted that the best way to thank her would be to fill out the survey on the receipt. I vowed that I would. I posed for pictures of me with my five different boxes. None of us could stop laughing.

She said I could expect the same if I drive through tomorrow at the same time. I warned her that tomorrow is date night and not to tease me because we WILL roll through.

BTW hubs was asleep by the time I got home. I insisted on waking him up to show him my donut overload, but it looks like I’m the only one victim to eating multiple glazed donuts tonight.

Not to worry, there are still 34 or so— plus 50 munchkins— left for tomorrow.

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